写作指导 写作任务:

作为一名高三毕业班的学生,多次的"考场磨炼"中肯定有许多难忘的故事,考试过程中"或"成绩发布后"你最难忘的一次经历,写一篇120-150词的演讲稿,准备在英语课堂演讲比赛中登台演讲。

发言稿的开头已经给出,不计入总词数。

Good afternoon! Everybody!

I’m glad to be here to share one of my unforgettable experiences with you.
_________________

分析:

1. 确定写作话题。本写作任务要求写一篇记叙文,写作话题是一次难忘的经历,但仔细审题,会发现写作任务对写作内容有一定的提示和限制。文章的话题是"考试过程中"或"成绩发布后"一次难忘的经历,作者可以根据回忆,记述一次难忘的考试经历；也可以描述考试成绩发布后自己受到表扬或批评的故事。但前提是"令人难忘"的,也就是具有特别意义的一次经历。

2. 难忘经历的描述。因为是记叙文,文章可以按照事情发生、发展和结局的顺序去安排写作,语言要准确,选词要丰富,句式要灵活、富于变化,尽量尝试使用一些结构较复杂的句子,提高表达的质量。人称主要用第一人称,时态主要要用一般过去时。

3. 安排篇章结构。此类记叙文可以从以下三个层面展开写作:第一,简单叙述写作的目的——介绍一次难忘的经历,并引出事情的内容概要,作为全文的主题句或主题段；第二,详细叙述事情的发生、发展和结局,注意写作内容要有实际意义,要真正引人注意、耐人回味,以达到令人难忘的效果。最后,谈谈自己的感受或评论得与失,做以总结。

4. 参考句和词语。文章在提出话题,描述难忘的经历时可用:This is the most interesting / wonderful / regretful ... thing that I will never forget. / I will remember one thing that happened ... forever.等；在叙述事情的发展过程时可以用:at first, then, finally / in the end等；过渡性的词语可以用:however, what’s more, besides等。

初稿:

Good afternoon! Everybody!

I’m glad to be here to share one of my unforgettable experiences with you. It happened during the midterm examinations. I was studying in senior one at the time.

I was not very good at English and so I used to worry about it. Luckily I found my good friend Li Yang sitting in front of me and he was very good at English. However, when I whispered to him for the answers, he refused to give me any help, which made me feel unhappy. I failed that examination and my teacher was very unhappy with me. I made up my mind not to be friends with him any longer.

A few days later, he came over to chat with me. It was then that I realized my mistake of trying to cheat during the exam. Later he offered to help me with my English study. We practiced reading and writing a lot in our spare time and I made great progress with his help. In the final exam I was praised by my teacher.

教师点评:

1. 初稿描述了作者在一次英语考试中"企图抄袭却遭到好友的拒绝,而后得到他的帮助取得进步"的经历。文章谋篇布局较合理,故事叙述脉络清晰,时态和语态的运用准确无误。句子间使用一些过渡和衔接词语,显得比较自然合理。该文章基本算是一篇不错的文章。

2. 文章存在的问题:

①文章中部分句子结构松散,简单句过多,如:It happened during the midterm examinations. I was studying in senior one at the time. 以及I was not very good at English and so I used to worry about it. Luckily I found my good friend Li Yang sitting in front of me and he was very good at English.等,如果将它们改成并列句和复合句:It happened during the midterm examinations when I was in senior one.和I was not good at English at that time, but I wasn’t too worried because I found my good friend Li Yang, who was very good at English, sitting in front of me.就好多了。

②文章的结尾处用We practiced reading and writing a lot in my spare time and I made great progress with his help. In the final exam I was praised by my teacher. 做总结,句子太松散,不符合英语表达习惯,如改为"I made such great progress by practicing English with him in our spare time that I was even praised by my teacher in the final exam."会更好。

成稿:

Good afternoon! Everybody!

I’m glad to be here to share one of my most unforgettable experiences with you. It happened during the midterm examinations when I was in senior one.

I was not good at English at that time, but I wasn’t too worried about it because I found my good friend Li Yang, who was very good at English, sitting in front of me. However, when I whispered to him for the answers, he refused to give me any help, which made me quite upset. Of course, I failed that examination and my teacher was very angry with me. I made up my mind not to be friends with him any longer.

A few days later, however, he came to chat with me and made me realize my mistake of trying to cheat during an exam. What’s more, he offered to help me with my English study thereafter. I made such great progress by practicing English with him in my spare time that I was praised by my teacher in the final exams.

Powerful sentences:

1. I have taken many examinations since I began my school study, but the one that impressed me the most happened when I was in the sixth grade.

2. I was so deeply moved by what he said and his behavior that I spared no efforts in studying English in return.

3. Thanks to his help, I made much greater progress. Not only did I pass the final examinations but I was even praised by my teacher.

4. With his help and guidance, I finished my school study and got a perfect grade in the College Entrance Examinations.

5. I was very impressed by what he had done for us and I will remember him forever.

巩固练习:

下面是小明写的一篇日记,请你替他给加拿大的笔友Peter写一封信,告诉他这次难忘的经历和感受。

3月12日星期二晴

我是一个不敢举手回答问题的人。可是今天，当老师提问时，我鼓起勇气举了一次手，因为我想试试。手举得虽不如其他同学高，老师却叫了我。我刚回答完，教室里立刻响起了掌声。老师也表扬了我，我非常感动，决心以后课前要认真准备，上课多举手发言。

我永远不会忘记这一次掌声，因为它使我有了勇气，有了信心。

要求:120词左右(不包括给出的书信的开头和结尾部分)。

Dear Peter, www.hxw.red

I’d be very glad to tell you what happened in class today.

Have you had the same experiences in your studies? I look forward to receiving your letter soon.

Best wishes!

Yours,

Xiao Ming

第36期巩固练习参考范文:

Dear Peter,

I’d be very glad to tell you what happened in class today. As you know, I am a shy boy and I am always afraid of raising my hand to answer my teachers’ questions in class even though I know the answer. However, today, I plucked up courage and raised my hand when my teacher asked, so that I could have a try. It was not higher than others’, but my teacher found me and called my name. After I gave my answer, all my classmates cheered for me. What’s more, my teacher praised me, which made me very happy. I’ve made up my mind to prepare my lessons better and answer more questions in class in the future.

I will remember this experience forever, for it gave me confidence, courage and support from my classmates and teacher. Have you had the same experiences in your studies? I look forward to receiving your letter soon.

Best wishes!

hxw.red