2009年6月四级英语作文预测及范文(三)

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摘要：Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic A Food Poisoning Accident. You should wr…

Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic A Food Poisoning Accident. You should write at least 120 words, and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below:

你的几个同学因食用了从某超市买回的食品而中毒，幸亏及时治疗而脱险。请描述他(们)中毒与脱险的过程，并呼吁要加强食品安全。

A Food Poisoning Accident _________

_________

行文思路

本题属于情景式命题。提纲要求描述一件事情的经过，由此可判断本文应为记叙文。

根据所给提纲，本文应包含如下内容：交待食物中毒的背景和原因;叙述中毒的和脱险的经过;谈谈由此引发的感想，呼吁加强食品安全。

高分范文

A Food Poisoning Accident

Last month, I [1]witnessed a food poisoning accident [2]happening to my classmates. At that time the situation was really very dangerous and urgent. Though finally they got out of danger, this accident [3]is still vivid in my mind.

That day was Julie’s birthday, one of my classmates. In order to celebrate it, her roommates bought a big birthday cake for her from a supermarket nearby. They shared the cake happily. [4]However, after a while, all of them felt abdominal pain, nausea and dizziness. Two of them even cannot stand up because of great pain. We [5]rushed to send them to the hospital. [6]It turned out that the cake they ate had expired its guarantee period. Futunately, [7]due to timely treatment, they all recovered very soon.

[4]However, this accident [8]leaves me a deep ponder. I think it is very urgent to take effective measures to improve food safety. [4]Firstly, the government should [9]strengthen supervision and administration on food safety. [4]More importantly, to those who immoral businessmen, more strict punishment should be given. [4]Besides, we consumers should be more careful in buying food. [10]Only in this way can we make sure that no same accident happens.

【亮点点评】

[1]“目睹，目击”。

[2]“发生在某人身上”，现在分词短语作定语。

[3]“仍然令我记忆犹新”。

[4]过渡衔接词语，使文章条理清晰、衔接紧密。

[5]“闻讯赶来”。

[6]“结果是，原来是”。

[7]“由于及时的治疗”。

[8]“留给我深深的思考”。

[9]“加强监管”。

[10]“only+状语”位于句首，引起句子部分倒装。

佳句临摩