holier-YAN：

我把作文就贴在这了，望丁sir能批下，打个分(我是考六级的)

Dear Annan

Thanks for reading my letter. As we all know, the peace of the world has risen many people’s focus on it. I also have my own idea on it.

Nowadays, a variety of conflicts happen every day all over the world and many people sacrifized Because of that. We know wars bring the people poverty and disaster. Because of the war many people lost their relatives, many children can’t go to the school and haven’t enough food to eat. The present condition of the peace of the world couldn’t satisfied us. We hope the conflicts can be minimized. We appeal that all of the countries could stop these evil behavious.

I’m happy to see that you have done many to keep the peace of the world. I would also be very glad to see the world without the wars and full of love.

Your’s advocator

Holier

错误：

1.the peace of the world has risen many people’s focus on it. / the peace of the world has aroused many people’s attention .

2.can’t go to the school / can’t go to school

3.The present condition of the peace of the world couldn’t satisfied us. / … couldn’t satisfy us/

4.these evil behavious. / behaviors

5.have done many / have done a lot

6. I would also be very glad to see the world without the wars and full of love. / I would also be very glad to see a world without wars and full of love.

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